I’m sorry it’s been so long since my last post. Life, as usual, in my house has been chaos. We could possibly classify it as somewhat organized chaos but still. We are transitioning yet again. It seems like a never ending process.
Mike has officially quit his old job and gotten his CDL which he’s been wanting to do for a while now. It’s been almost two months of training, crappy pay and crazy hours but theoretically now that he had his license the real money should start. Which is good because we are a little behind and need vehicle repairs pretty badly. But we are on the upswing now.
I just finished watching the movie Moana for the fifth or so time trying to pinpoint why I resonate with it so much. I can relate to Moana in that I know what is expected of me even though I feel like I can’t be that person. Not the way other people are. I always swam upstream, did my own thing trying to do the right thing whether anyone agreed with me or not.
It’s terrifying. I spend much of my life feeling inadequate to the job I’ve been called yet far too stubborn to give up. I do what I must for the people I love. I am a voyager, explorer, wayfinder. I don’t travel in strait lines and see in black and white. I’m creative and I try to find every shade of the rainbow even when things are dark and bleak. I try to see the potential, the good in people.
Spoiler alert: Moana defeats Te Kah with compassion by reminding her who she used to be not by using brute force. And that is very much my style. I want to live people, make them feel worthy, give them a reason to be better. My kids do that for me. I am strong for them, I am kind and patient for them, I step out of my comfort zone every day to teach them that you don’t have to be who others say you are and you don’t have to stay where you are. Chase the horizon. Go beyond the reef. Be more and do more than you ever thought possible. It’s who God made you to be.