Homeless is a state of mind. I was homeless for two months though, no one would really call it that. My dad lost his job for reasons that still don’t make sense. As a result, we got evicted from our apartment, and while I was away at college my parents packed everything they could in our minivan and moved from Wisconsin to New Mexico to live with friends.
For two months I didn’t have a home address. I either had my mail sent to our friends’ house where my parents were living or directly to my school, but even that was difficult because the next year my campus was closing and I would be changing schools. Registering for classes at the new school became complicated because I had to put down an address that I didn’t have. God was very good to us, though. My dad found work right away and at the end of those two months my parents moved into their own place. It wasn’t much and it was the worst living arrangement we have ever had to endure, but at least we had an address.
However, I remained homeless long after I regained an address. The two biggest things in my life had changed in a drastic way. First, I couldn’t bring myself to feel at home in the mobile home my parents lived in: my heart wasn’t in it. Second, I couldn’t even look forward to going back to the school where I had felt at home. My campus had closed and I was moving to the other campus, treading on more foreign ground. I was angry, hurt, and lost and I stayed that way long into the next school year.
Because I was so angry, I couldn’t hear God whispering the answers to my questions. I didn’t want to know the answers because He wasn’t handling the situation like I wanted it to be handled. God was doing miracles left and right and I was missing them because I was too angry to listen and see what He was doing. When my parents moved to New Mexico we didn’t have any furniture and only the most essential dishes, clothes, and tools. When my parents moved into the mobile home God provided all the furniture and dishes we needed. He even provided a washer and dryer later that summer so we didn’t have to continue using the Laundromat. I was praying and asking God to work miracles and provide for my family and He did.
I think His greatest miracle was the one I never asked for. He changed me. It started that summer when He turned my world upside-down, and it continued throughout the next school year. Slowly, He broke down my walls of anger and mistrust and brought the real me back out into the world. He brought out the me who loved meeting new people and seeing how God made even the slightest details work into a solution to a great problem. I am eternally grateful that God hears the cry of our hearts louder than the cry of our mouths.